Ever since I was a wee lass, I have been afraid of spideys. Their hard hideous bodies repulsed me! The thought of their furry legs scuttling across my arm terrified me! Then, one day... I got over it.

It happened almost a year ago. I decided to let a brown spidey, affectionately named Shelob, live in my shower. Her and I had a mutual agreement. I leave her alone, she leaves me alone and with that silent acknowledgement, we got along beautifully. Soon after, the terror towards her species left me and I found myself capturing the creatures in other parts of my house to place them gently outside. For seven months Shelob and I lived harmoniously together until she up and left, leaving her dusty web vacant.

The nerve of her! She didn't even say goodbye.

I mourn her loss, but also wonder if I have made a mistake. Shelob is gone, but there are more of her kind living in my bathroom now.

Yes, yes. That must be it. My genuine kindness to one spidey has invited more of them. Surely Shelob spoke fondly of me to the others in the strange and obscure places where spideys congregate. She must have given me generous reviews before the great Sage and Shaman Araknids at the spidey ceremonials in the woodshed.

Now, every corner in the bathroom has been taken up! Arachnophobia has not returned, but I've become a bit impatient. I simply can't house all the spideys in the world. I'm afraid, if they don't move out soon, I may have to commit mass genocide against them all...